Creditor Call: Final Notice

Jay Leno spends much of his time and money extending his car collection. Here he stands in front of a row of Dusenbergs in his collection. His collection also includes a Lamborghini Miura; a 1932 Packard Twin Six 12-cylinder coupe; a 1913 Mercer; several Bugattis; two Stanley Steamers; a 1956 Chrysler Imperial; a 1966 Dodge Coronet Hemi; A Dodge Viper; and a 1955 Buick Roadmaster. His favorite vehicle is his McLaren F1.

Wadda Fuck? The man never leaves his house, but yet needs over 100 cars. Down the driveway, up the driveway, down the driveway... what fun!

OMGH Penalty: 5% luxury tax on every vehicle. 3 automobiles exempt.

Kim Basinger and her investment group purchased the town of Braselton, in Jackson County, Georgia for $20 million in 1989 but had to sell it in 1993 when she declared bankruptcy.

Wadda Fuck (squared)? Kim, it's called 40% donation return from the government. Ever heard of AIDS, Cancer, even a friggin' skin disease. Pick One! She buys a town? Even God is saying, "that's one selfish bitch".

OMGH Penalty: $90,000 plus 3.5% interest ever year since this hick town was bought. It was the late 80's. We're being generous.

Liza Minnelli reportedly spent $4 million on her 2002 wedding to music producer David Gest. More than 1,000 guests were invited including Michael and Tito Jackson, Macaulay Culkin, David Hasselhoff, Anthony Hopkins, and Elizabeth Taylor.

She marries a Mr. West Hollywood 1956, runner-up (uhem, fuck-up!) and spends 4 million on a wedding. 16 months of wedded bliss = $8,000/day. Sound investment. Can you believe Gene Simmons of KISS banged this??? >>>>>

OMGH Penalty: $225,000 flat (Gene Simmons will be a future credit call)

Bone is for the dog, meat is for the man!

Britney, everywhere in the Middle East and the Mediterannean hairy bastards are wanking off to you right now! You've lost our respect, but you've gained guys named Akmed and Georgio as eternal fans. 10 more pounds and Iraq might one day be war-free.

OMGH Courtesy Creditor Call

(AP) A judge on Tuesday Sept. 11, 2007, refused to dismiss portions of a lawsuit against Lohan over an October 2005 accident in which her Mercedes-Benz collided with a van.

Don't tell us you can't afford your OMGH Charity Fine, Lindsey.

Salary
Just My Luck (2006)
$7,500,000
Mean Girls (2004)
$1,000,000
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (2004)
$1,000,000
Freaky Friday (2003)
$550,000

Lindsey Lohan owes OMGH Charity: $117,000 for a total of 12 fuck-ups, by OMGH standards.

OJ's lesser pocket book calls for Larry H. Parker

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - O.J. Simpson was questioned by Las Vegas police after a sports memorabilia dealer accused the former star athlete and murder defendant of robbing him at gunpoint, police and others said on Friday.

OJ accused of another crime. Larry H. Parker is calling.

You know, I'm sorry I have to throw this in... even after 13 years I still can't believe Nicole is no longer with us. Damn, she was fine. I understand OJ believed she was a slut. I'm sure she deserved to be choked out once in a while. But murder? It's a valuable life lesson to kids, to never... oh wow I didn't notice I put that particular picture up of Nicole. Where was I?... Oh the lesson.... Damn, she was fine. Why did you have be a slut, Nicole. Dammit, why!?!?

Make it a Matt Damon day

(CP) - A star-studded Toronto benefit gala hosted by Matt Damon has brought in $1 million in support of domestic and global children's charities.

One X One founder Joelle Berdugo Adler said having Damon take part in the gala "means the world."

Matt Damon - the first celebrity honored by OMGH, hereby excluding him from our website, if any negative situation might arise with the actor. Including bad movie openings, bad film reviews, bad papparzi photos, and any and all bad stuff.

Matt Damon, we salute you! We do hope all celebrities use you as a template for life.

Rosie version 6.0

In here new upcoming book Rosie O'Donnell claims that Barbara came to resent her. For Instance, she writes that the audience would scream, "I love you, Rosie" during commercial breaks, "and Barbara tells them in this schoolteacher tone, 'It is impolite to say I love you to one person when there are four of us up here.' Then a stony silence sets in."

Rosie gets the award for making the fastest friends turned fastest enemies. The former Queen of all Media has been reduced to a pissed-off-liberal-lesbian-homemaker.

You know I remember watching Rosie in the early 90's as a stand-up Comedian. She appeared regularly on Arsenio Hall. Hilarious. Her skinny, sexually-ambiguous 1.0 version. Now we're to 6.0 - wired for max gayness and liberalism that even makes Hilary Clinton shutter.

The Official OMGH Charitable Foundation

OMGH Hollywood Donation Schedule:
Celebrity must owe the OMGH charity the amount listed if...

Dates another celeb just to "up their fuck": $8,000
(uhem, J-Lo)
Marries another celeb just to "up their fuck": $20,000
(uhem, Catherine Z. J... you're not fooling me, bitch)
*up their fuck=an attempt to become more famous by association

Caught on camera spouting inapproriate or utterly stupid things: $2,000-$1,000,000
(as low as a Paris Hilton to a Kramer from Seinfeld... this penalty is per sentance, not just an entire conversation. See below, Miss Paris owes us $30,000)




Caught on camera without make-up (monster sighting): $6,500
(i swear to God, Oprah... You're still giving me nightmares)

Create sex tape: $35,000

Commit felony or higher crime: $125,000

Appear on MTV cribs: $10,000

Not allowed entrance to an A-rated celeb hangout: $4,000
(argh, that simple-minded American Pie actress... of course I don't know her name... i would shoot myself if i did... oh fuck, it's Tera Ried... fuck me, I remembered!)

Extravagant Expense: $50,000 luxury tax for every 1million spent or 5%
(thank you hip hop world for this one! as we would be receiving donations from names like Lil' Cucamonga, DJ Roughie Rough, & Killa Wang)

Converts to Scientology: $283,037.15
(why such an amount?... fuck 'em, that's why... let those bastards figure out how to fit 15 cents on that second line of their check)

There are many more... many more. We will let our celebrities present them to you every day.

The OMGH Charity raises money to assist communities around the world - please see on the right.

OMG! Hollywood is born...

Let me first get it out of the way... ready.... Whadda fuck is up with Hollywood!!?!?

Phew... now that that's out of the way I will try to be a little less profain on this blog. But who are we kidding... when you are writing about Hollywood you can't help but use at least 5 cuss words in almost every paragraph.... sentence?... no beter make it paragraph... afterall I'm not Rosie O'Donnell and don't aspire to be.

I would like to welcome everyone to OMG! Hollywood. A site that obviously pokes fun at the rich... but more importanly... my underlying message... directed at the rich (hereafter known as the TBC, or the bling crew... and in some instances as the TBBC, aka Celine Dion). A message to them all, more like a demand to:

1) be more like Matt Damon (obvious in future posts)
2) give back more to communities rather than only to charities

OMG! Hollywood is doing Jo-Shmo a service in asking celebrities to donate 1% of their wealth to the world. Not to charities, helping Gerald Ford build a home or adapting African kids. But to people like you and me. (read next post)

Ever heard the saying "more money than i know what to with". Celebrities do no embrace that saying. 6 homes, 10 luxury cars, diamond dog collars.

When even God is looking down on P Diddy, watching all his extravagant purchases and saying, "God, damn...!", then we know we have a problem with Hollywood.

Welcome to OMG! Hollywood. Where, for the first time, exploiting celebs becomes a charitable effort.